need your advice (conflict between me and my friend)

[Elision]

as long as you don't bother anyone, no one should bother u.

I had to step in here. This is plain false. People get shot all day for walking across the wrong intersection, or wearing the wrong color shirt. There's a lot of disgusting people out there that, unfortunately, we have to share oxygen with.

[ladelsofgravy]

as long as you don't bother anyone, no one should bother u.

I had to step in here. This is plain false. People get shot all day for walking across the wrong intersection, or wearing the wrong color shirt. There's a lot of disgusting people out there that, unfortunately, we have to share oxygen with.

this is true. the 4th ward is arguably one of the nastiest places in my entire state and even the police are afraid to go there.

the chances of me being a victim of a violent crime are probably 1% as long as i leave before 7pm. not too high but i still wouldn't take that risk.

[ladelsofgravy]

This. OP is being a baby, if you were really "best friends" you'd go visit, no questions asked. I would be offended too. You say it's selfish for him to drag you there, well, in my opinion it's even more selfish for you not to visit because it gives you a weird feeling in your tummy. It's one day of visiting, what the fuck is the harm?

thanks for your honesty, man.

it's not only the risk of going there. it's moreso the payoff.

for him, me not visiting him was the central issue he had with me.

for me, it was when i visited him, we just never connected. our friendship was much stronger over the phone than it's been in real life and he's done nothing to improve it. i suggested places to go and things to do, but he didn't accept any of them.

it wasn't just me being afraid of the ghetto. it was moreso that he's just boring to hang out with and the problem is compounded by the fact that i have to visit a place no man should ever want to be at just to see him.

[ladelsofgravy]

So, a few weeks later. Looking at it objectively. I learned a big lesson.

"right vs. right for me".

I don't have to be objectively right, factually right or 100% morally right. I just have to do right for me.