by EminemInsider » Mar 25th, '13, 09:33
What pisses me off is how so many people hop on a bandwagon and regurgitate the stances of the popular fucks in their party across the board. They're just such fucking sheep. It would be funny if it weren't so sad.
"I'm a conservative":
"You leftist hippie. You tree-hugging, bleeding-heart liberal!"
Taxes: Lower 'em. Less government spending and lower taxes will fix the economy. We need to get outta this fucking debt.
Health Care: Ya'll just want handouts. No. More. Government. Spending.
Abortion: The lawd says it's a sin. It's a chald and it's murder.
Death Penalty: Frah 'em! Thou shalt not kill, or thou shalt be killed.
Israel: We need to support Israel. But not because we give a fuck about the Jews, but because Israel is our ally and we need their strong military to help us in the war on terror. Remember, the Jews are going to hell, according to our religion. They don't accept Jesus Chrahst as the savior.
Gay Marriage: The lawd says homosexual acts are an abomination. Besides which, marriage is a religious institution. Letting homosexuals get married would destroy the sanctity of marriage.
Wars in Iraq/Afghanistan: Our national security was threatened.
"I'm a liberal"
"You right wing, redneck, fascist Republican, bro!"
Taxes: We need to start taxing the rich people more, bro. Those right wing fascists just want lower taxes for the rich. We need our federal government to boost the economy.
Health Care: If you get sick in this country, the Republicans just want to say, "fuck you, you're on your own, dude." Apparently, humanity is way beyond them. They have free health care in Canada, bro.
Abortion: A woman has the right to choose what do you with her body, bro.
Death Penalty: With this one, it's pretty split.
Israel: You zionist fuckhead! Israel is an expansionist, imperialist nation, bro. You can't just put some Jews on Arab soil and expect everyone to get along. Give the Palestinians their land back! The British fucked up, dude.
Gay Marriage: Not allowing gays to get married infringes on equal rights. If two people love each other, who is anyone to tell them they can't get married?
War in Iraq/Afghanistan: We invaded Iraq for oil, and 9/11 was Bush's fault, bro. (In extreme cases): Bush knocked down the towers. 9/11 was an inside job. The government puts fluoride in our water for mind control, and the Illuminati has their hand in every corrupt aspect we see.
I refuse to hop on board one of these pathetic teams. None of these idiots actually think for themselves. Their minds are made up and if they read a newspaper article or turn on the TV and see something with a "biased slant," they get really angry at the "idiot" from the other team. If they see someone from their team, though, "he's speaking the truth!"